Wednesday, September 23, 2009

More Supervision Please

The other day, our 5-year-old asked my wife if she could play with a new toy that she had just gotten.

My wife answered, "No, not without some supervision."

My 5-year-old replied, "Mommy, where do we keep the supervision?"

If only it were that simple. :-)

Friday, March 06, 2009

Enough Already!

First things first. I know it's been a long time. When I last posted, I thought I would have a little more time on my hands.

That was because I had no job. I was in mortgage until last November. Yes, mortgage. It's OK, I've heard 'em all before, go ahead.

Luckily, I was one of the GOOD guys. You know, the kind that only gave mortgages to those individuals whom the bank felt could actually REPAY them one day.

2008 was a harsh year in the mortgage biz. My pipeline dried up a bit, but not from a lack of effort. You simply couldn't get a loan in 2008 unless you could walk on water, spell "dysphasia", and understand Bob Dylan.

After helping my clients' loans get through underwriting for a few weeks, I would finally get a loan approved.

Then, the day before settlement, I would have the following conversation with my underwriters:

"Are we all set for closing tomorrow?", I would ask.

"Yeah, about that," my underwriter would reply, "I know we gave you an approval and all, but, after thinking about it a little more, we've decided not to approve this loan."

"Maybe I misunderstood this letter that says 'approved'," I would say.

"No, you're right," my underwriter would say, "we did originally approve the loan. It's just that now we've decided not to."

I swear to you I am not making this up. This is pretty much a verbatim conversation I had on several occasions.

It would usually end with me shouting a few things into my speakerphone that probably shouldn't really be shouted, let alone spoken, in the workplace.

Banks and lenders were so nervous to approve ANYBODY, they wound up approving NOBODY.

Then, my clients would call me.

"So, Chris, are we ready for our closing tomorrow?", they would ask.

"Yeah, about that," I would reply...

So I decided I wasn't going to treat my clients that way and took a little break, cleared my head a bit. A couple of months later now, and I'm BACK with a great mortgage lender, the number one mortgage lender in the country, actually.

Just in time, too, because rates are about to drop through the floor.

Can you say REFI BOOM?

Although, that's not necessarily a GOOD thing. The reason it's happening is because the economy is in the crapper.

The reason the economy is in the crapper is because the government decided that all of us folks who have worked hard all our lives and have always paid our mortgages on time, should pay for the sins of all those who DIDN'T pay their mortgage on time.

Apparently, we should also be forced to suffer while the guys who gave 100% financing to people with 500 credit scores are taking their private jets to the Bahamas.

Apparently, corporations now have a good excuse to lay people off and cut costs wherever they can. I still have friends without jobs, I have family members without jobs.

So enough! Enough! No more bailouts. No more hand-holding.

CEO's, if your company is about to go broke, we're not paying for it, tough. The government should NOT be expected to bail you out.

Take that bailout money and divide it up among every American citizen. We'll all have enough to pay off our mortgages and stimulate the economy.

In fact, Jon Stewart nailed it the other night on "The Daily Show". Best. Rant. Ever.

You should take 5 minutes right now and watch it below. Then watch the scene right below it from the movie "Network". It's time to get mad as hell!

Then you'll know exactly what we need to do to get out of this mess.

I promise I'll be back to my humorous self next time. :-)












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